Tuesday, February 5, 2013

Moving Mountains

Kelsea has done it more than I, but every now and then I like to go back and read some of my posts from the past 4.5 months. Well, this morning, once I arrived at the NICU (The doctors all make fun of me because they wonder if I ever sleep) and was briefed from the night before, one immediately came to my mind.

Only a Mountain was a post from September 20, 2012. It was my 2nd post, but I believe in it. It was written half way through the middle of one of the toughest weeks I have had to deal with. We had so much going on in our lives in five short days. I didn't know how we were ever going to make it. We had just found out about Hayden's Omphalocele, we had a trip to Springfield for our first specialist visit, and we had a 24 hour trip to a funeral in Minnesota and back after Kelsea's cousin had been murdered a week before.

I was talking about only telling some people the "exciting" part of our ultrasound from Monday, the 17th, which at the time, I meant that we were having a boy. Looking back though, the exciting part was the whole story. It was God's whole story, omphalocele and all! It is great that we were having a boy, but looking back and rereading some of the e-mails and cards we have received, reading the stories of others testimonies and how our testimony has changed their outlook or renewed and strengthened their faith, I now realize that this is His story! It was never about us or Hayden, it was how we fit into just a tiny part of God's greater plan.

All of the things that Kelsea and I have thought were mountains are disappearing faster than we can blink an eye. As I sit here this morning, watching this beautiful boy and typing (literally) I can't help but smile as I think how far we have come and what he has accomplished. I know there are many more hurdles ahead of us, but he is winning the race and we are not looking back.

As of this morning, Hayden has reached his birth weight of 2770g (6lbs 2oz). He is 13.5 hours from reaching his feeding goal of 20 ml/hr. Once he reaches this, he will then start bolus feeding. This means it won't be continuous, it will be larger quantities in smaller time periods. This will help give him more sleep/wake patterns and will hopefully help him nurse. Speaking of nursing, the past few days, he has been nursing on Kelsea. Not a lot, but a couple of times. However, since he has been on a constant feed, he doesn't really have a "need" or hunger. Hopefully that will all change. He also dirtied his drawers in every single diaper change last night! I told the nurse sorry, but then cheered Hayden and gave him a high five.

This is only a mountain
You don't have to find your way around it
Tell it to move, it'll move
Tell it to fall, it'll fall
This is only a moment
You don't have to let your fear control it
Tell it to move, it'll move
Tell it to fall, it'll fall

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