Snow Worries....It's in God's Hands

As always, if you would like to be updated by an e-mail whenever I add a new post, add your e-mail address in the form below and then click subscribe. You will get an e-mail asking for verification. After you verify your e-mail address, you will get an e-mail the following morning between 9 and 11 a.m. (Central I believe) that shows you I have added a new post.

HOWEVER....TO GET THE FULL EFFECT...INCLUDING PICTURES AND MUSIC, YOU WILL HAVE TO ACTUALLY GO TO THE BLOG WEBSITE. YOU CAN READ THE BLOG ON THE E-MAIL, BUT IT IS BETTER IF YOU OPEN THE LINK AND GO TO THE WEBSITE TO READ!

 

 

Enter your email address:


Delivered by FeedBurner

First off, we want everybody to know that Hayden will make his big debut this Thursday, February 7th, at 9 pm on Fox 2 in St. Louis. We're not sure exactly what part of the newscast we will appear, but it will be sometime. I also have no idea how I will sound, but if they decide to keep me in the video, I know I will at least look funny in my clothes! If you can't find it on TV, they do have an iPhone/iPad App that carries live streaming of their newscasts. They might also have it on their website.


So yesterday was a rough afternoon. We went from tears of joy around 10 a.m. to frustration and worries around 2 p.m.

I slept in yesterday morning and didn't come in until 10! That is a first I think, but it was needed. That's ok though because I stayed late Friday night and Hayden and I listened to Matt Longo on the radio (Tuned In app) on the iPhone. It wasn't a win, but Hayden enjoyed listening to the game! He raised his right arm as if cheering a couple of times....when Matt would stop talking!

When we came in yesterday, Ann (our nurse for the day) was talking about his feedings and how he had the doctors had increased his feedings 1ml every 8 hours. We were up to 15ml/hr and were within about 24 hours of reaching his goal for his daily feedings. Ann told us that when we reach that, if Hayden can tolerate the feedings, they would probably take out his PICC line. This is the line that runs from a vein in his head close to his heart. It is used to give supplemental nutrients and is more of a permanent line since it can be so hard to insert an iv into his small veins. When she said this, I was overcome. It is so wonderful to think of my boy having one less line running to him. It is more of a mental thing, but I am so cautious when I pick him up because he has so many lines running to him. Four of them are just stuck on which monitor his heart, breathing, and oxygen saturation, but his NG tube and his PICC line are a little more permanent and I'm always so afraid of pulling them and hurting him when I pick him up. Kelsea is an old pro by now. As for me....I'm still learning to deal with it. The tears were great though. I never mind tears of joy!

Shortly after this, I was holding him and the March of Dimes came in for our first family photo session! We signed up for this, something they offer to NICU families every so often I believe. The photographers loved Hayden, as everybody does!

After 12:00, Hayden's O2 saturation levels started dropping. He couldn't keep them above 90% (I just assumed he inherited dad's sleep apnea!) and the nurse was not liking that. Neither was mom! we tried a couple of different things and gave him some Tylenol, but nothing seemed to work. He finally calmed down for a few minutes, so Kelsea and I snuck out to get some well-needed snacks! We went to the Ronald McDonald room for soda, combos, and a Kit-Kat! Kelsea headed back to go pump, and on my way back, I was talking to a maintenance worker in the hallway. She texted me a few minutes later and said I probably needed to get back because his saturation was down again, and his heart rate and respiration had increased and the doctors were bedside. Of course, this is never what you wanted to hear. We were a little anxious and overwhelmed I think because all three things were doing stuff they weren't supposed to. Doctors decided to give him a little help with breathing and give him some oxygen. Ann kept telling us not to worry, that this isn't a setback, but of course, when you have to add the nose prongs to give him a little help breathing, parent's don't like that!

Well, it was basically just room air, but it helped him. His levels immediately went back to normal and calmed down. His temperature stayed low and he was good to go.

After a good visit from Aunt Bonnie and Uncle Bruce, we met them for dinner at Fortel's Pizza Den in Creve Coeur....one of us soccer coaches favorites! We always consume mass quantities of Shelly's Deluxe when we're in town for Eric's tournament in the fall!

Kelsea and I headed back to the hospital around 7:00 and Hayden and I caught the end of the Blue Devil basketball game again (not a good one!). Well, it was more like I did because he was sound asleep and his vitals were perfect. We stayed until about 9:30 and he only opened his eyes once. It was such a good night!

As we left, it started flurrying. By the time we got home, got done with out chores (wiping down dining tables at night) and headed up for bed, it was coming down pretty good. The weather channel said we should only have about 1/2". However, when I left this morning...they were way off!! Ended up with probably close to 3" in Creve Coeur, less in the city. However, 64 was horrible coming in! Good thing it was early Sunday morning and there was zero traffic!












When I got here, Christina (the night nurse) filled me in on Hayden. His weigh jumped last night. He was up to 2725g (just a little over 6 pounds..first time he has been back over 6 pounds since the first few days when he dropped) and we are only 45 grams shy of his birthweight! Christina also said he did perfect overnight, had two small poops, and vitals were perfect. Plus, his oxygen prongs were not even close to his nose, so she told the doctor on rounds this morning that she doesn't think he needs it. Well...the end result is this we pulled the plug....I mean prongs and his heart rate, respiration are still fine and his O2 saturation is still at 97-98%! Great start to the morning! Surgery came in and changed his dressing on his "O." It is amazing how much it has changed. I purposely haven't put pictures on here because of it, but am going to today. However, I will put some space between the end so you have to scroll down to see it...if you want! It's not bad looking...just something different!

Again, all three of us thank everybody for your thoughts and prayers. Hayden is truly a miracle from God and it is truly amazing what he has done for us, our family and friends, and people we have never met. This has been a long journey, but we haven't questioned it. For whatever reasons, God chose Hayden for Kelsea and I and we couldn't be happier that His plan is so much better than we could ever fathom.

Baby it's Cold Outside

Holy cow! 6 degrees when I left Creve Coeur this morning. Thank goodness I get on I-64 within about 2 minutes of leaving the RMH because it would've taken a half hour to warm up the truck driving 30 mph!  I have always loved driving, especially in the morning, with a cup of coffee as my co-passenger! Even when I lived in Florida, the 30 minute drive every morning from Venice to Brookside Middle School was kind of pleasant. Now, I wouldn't like driving (more like sitting) in heavy traffic every morning, but if the vehicle is moving, I like driving! The mornings here in St. Louis are even better. When I leave the house about 5:30, not only do I have my good friend "Joe" with me, but I am going to see my son! It is like it's my birthday every morning! Every mile marker that flies by me, every car I pass (I let some pass me just so I'm not the fastest one out there...), the anticipation builds. When we were little, anytime my parents would take us to St. Louis, we would always have a competition to see who could spot the St. Louis Arch first. Well, on my morning drives, the Arch has turned in to the Barnes-Jewish complex and blue Children's Hospital sign! Every time I come around the corner and out from under the overpass, it pops up on my left hand side like a spotlight, leading me "home!"


This morning, it was pure joy again! Hayden pooped 4 times yesterday and is still tolerating his feeds! His TPN (total parenteral nutrition) was removed yesterday afternoon because he is getting enough nutrients from Kelsea (via NG tube right now). He is now just getting sugar water I believe in addition to his breast milk. Surgery came by about 20 minutes ago and they are going to increase his feeds more rapidly starting today. Instead of increasing every 12 hours, they are now going to go up 1ml every 8 hours! That is awesome news because it means he is getting closer to his goal of daily feeds. Right now, according to his weight, that is about 21 ml/hr. However, as his weight increases, he will need more calories, so that could change in the next couple of days. Speaking of his weight, he was up another 20 grams at last night's "weigh-in!" He now weighs a little over 2690 grams, which translates into about 5 lbs and 15 oz! We are inching closer and closer to that birth weight!

Ok, more about his feeding. Once he hits his goal of ml/hr, they will then do what they call Bolus feeding and start working their way backwards, kind of. It is intermittent feeding (on a side note, I love hearing about 15 surgeons and neonatologists talk outside our room after the surgeons did their rounds, filling in the rest of the team.... "Mr. Hoskins is doing great. He is tolerating his feeds. He is awesome. Yadda, yadda, yadda!") that more resembles actual eating at certain time periods. Once they reach the 21+ml/hr, they will then start chunking it into certain feeding times. The goal then is for him to become hungrier in between feeds and hopefully start breast feeding more and/or taking some by bottle.

It is amazing and evident that prayers have been working. We can't even begin to thank you enough for everything that everyone has done for us. It is humbling. It is amazing. It is reaffirming. It is the power of faith and God!

I thought about this last night while reading an e-mail from my mom. If anybody knows my mom...and me....you know that neither of us like to sit still. Her more so than me! We are both early risers (which by the way, a nurse just walked by and asked me when I sleep!), and even though she can accomplish more in a 24 hour time period, neither of us can sit still long. I attribute it to my self-diagnosed ADD! In my classroom, I think I might walk 5+ miles a day because I am continuously walking around the room. Anyways.... she mentioned in her e-mail about how she was praising God because he has allowed her to be calm and patient when she is in the NICU. This was one concern I had talked about with Kelsea a couple of months ago because I was afraid that the days would drag on and on and on while sitting here. I thought I would go stir crazy and that I wouldn't be able to sit here hours on end. However, I also have to thank God because just the opposite has happened. Believe it or not, the days actually fly by and I tell Kelsea many days that I feel like I didn't have enough time to get everything accomplished. I can sit in this chair, that I complained about to many, many people beforehand because I thought it would be horrible, for 8 hours straight, get up and go to the bathroom, and then do it again. I stare at Hayden without blinking an eye. I can stand over his crib and let him squeeze my finger or hold his pacifier without getting tired. I can't hold him that long because, well...for those of you that know me....you take my body heat, plus that same quality that he inherited from his father (the nurses call him their "little hotbox"!) and those two don't mix well after about 15 minutes!!!

With all of these things that are happening before us, it is hard not to praise God's mercy and his plan for everything that He has done and put in place for us.

I am waiting on the Neonatology rounds and then Kelsea has her follow-up appointment at 8:30. It's a good thing the whole "compound" down here is connected via covered walkways or I might have had to hold him right before we left for the appointment because....baby, it's cold outside!






As always, if you would like to be updated by an e-mail whenever I add a new post, add your e-mail address in the form below and then click subscribe. You will get an e-mail asking for verification. After you verify your e-mail address, you will get an e-mail the following morning between 9 and 11 a.m. (Central I believe) that shows you I have added a new post.

HOWEVER....TO GET THE FULL EFFECT...INCLUDING PICTURES AND MUSIC, YOU WILL HAVE TO ACTUALLY GO TO THE BLOG WEBSITE. YOU CAN READ THE BLOG ON THE E-MAIL, BUT IT IS BETTER IF YOU OPEN THE LINK AND GO TO THE WEBSITE TO READ!

 

 

Enter your email address:


Delivered by FeedBurner

Lighting the Way

I just had to change the title because in my sick stupor, I forgot I sent a short update yesterday on his poop!


Well...since I have been sick since Monday morning with the stomach flu and have seen Hayden for about 30 minutes total in that time...including using Skype twice with my parents, Kelsea has had to fill me in on the updates. It seems like we finally turned a corner yesterday!

The following is also from Kelsea since I have been in bed for 2.5 days...

Isaiah 42:16 
16 I will lead the blind by ways they have not known, along unfamiliar paths I will guide them; I will turn the darkness into light before them and make the rough places smooth. These are the things I will do; I will not forsake them.

My dearest Hayden,

                It is hard to believe that you have been with us for a little over eleven days now.  I can still barely wrap my head around it.  You are so perfect in every way … Already you have taught me to love in a way that I never knew possible.  For four and a half long months, I worried about you so much.  In the beginning I remember being very scared for you, and selfishly, scared for me.  I had already lost one baby, and was so scared that I was going to lose you too. I loved you so much from the minute I found out you were growing inside of me.  I had prayed for you (well, I didn’t know it was going to be YOU), but I had prayed for a child for so long, and yet, somehow, I was still skeptical that God would answer my prayers.  Although I knew it wasn’t true, a part of me still felt like, because of the sinful past I had lived, I didn’t deserve you. Thankfully, I know that we have a loving and merciful God. I know this because he gave me you …

                I am so grateful for little, six pound, two ounce YOU.  At our first appointment, when we found out about your omphalocele, the doctor was almost apologetic … Daddy and I could tell from her voice that she was very worried about whether or not you would be able to “make it” in this world.  We were scared, but also hopeful … and so began our journey of prayer and dependence on God to see you safely into the world.  We made many, many (for once, this may be an under-exaggeration … no “Kelsea factor” required to account for my propensity for making up or over-exaggerating numbers) trips to different doctors, some of whom were cautiously optimistic, about your odds, and some of whom were not so much … We did lots of reading, most of which scared me more than it helped.  Luckily, you were blessed with a Daddy who has big shoulders and could “handle” most of the tough stuff, while I tried to focus only on stories of other “O” babies who had positive outcomes.

               I noticed that my prayers changed over time as God worked in my heart.  I remember nights of sobbing and crying out to God that I just wanted to get to see your little face, even if that was all I got to do.  Then, came nights of sobbing and praying that I would get to touch you, or at least hold you if the “unthinkable” were to happen.  Then, as we continued to pray, and you continued to clear each hurdle along the way, God began to allow me to see the possibilities of all that you could be.  First, we saw a two hemisphere brain, then a four chambered heart, a clean bill of health on the chromosomal testing, ten non-sandal footed toes, arms and legs of the perfect length, no cleft palate, and eventually, a heart that showed no signs of defect.  You passed each of your non-stress tests (NSTs) and   biophysical profiles (BPPs) with flying colors, and as the days and months passed, God revealed to me in my heart that you were going not only to make it, but to thrive.

                Then, near the end of our journey, I read some posts in a Mothers of Ompahlocele support group about “O” babies who appeared to be perfectly fine, but whose lungs just couldn’t tolerate the pressure of their “O” and were unable to survive outside of the womb.  I shared with the ladies of Columbus Road Church, who attended your baby shower, some of my specific worries (mostly about lung development and you being able to breathe). Our church held a special prayer service just for you (and we know that many, many other congregations and individuals had also adopted you in prayer).  We prayed for very specific things, a full term birth (we ALMOST made it … one day shy), a smooth surgery for both mommy and you, a big scream right when you came out (thank you very much for complying!), that we could see you, touch you, that you would be stabilized, that we would be able to hold you, to feed you, that you would be able to digest food, and the list goes on.

                The most amazing part of it all is that within 48 hours of your birth, pretty much every specific prayer request on that list had been answered.  Is God good or what?  You came out screaming, and pooped while doctors were still stitching me up.  You grasped mommy and daddy’s fingers before being whisked away to the NICU, and  you required oxygen for only a few hours your first night.  Mommy got to see you and touch you about 8 hours after you were delivered and got to hold you the very next day.  Daddy did the most precious and selfless thing ever  by waiting to hold you so that I could be the first.  He knew how very special this moment would be for me.  As I sat in my wheel chair, watching and waiting as the nurse attempted to “free” you from all of your cords and wires, the anticipation built, and I became overwhelmed with love and joy.  I just could not believe how gracious God had been to grant me this, my wish to hold my son, so soon after he was born, when all the reading and research I had done had prepared me that this might not happen for a very long time.  But as I have learned, the statistics don’t matter when God has a plan.  By the time the nurse put you in my arms, my lips were quivering and the tears were streaming down my face.  You were the most beautiful thing I had ever seen. 

                Imagine my surprise and elation again, when, before I had even been discharged from the hospital, the nurse asked if I wanted to try some skin-to-skin time, then again, when the lactation consultant came and offered that I could try “taking you to breast”.  She couldn’t even believe it.  I think she went to check with three or four different doctors before we began because she just couldn’t believe that they were going to let a baby with an omphalocele try to nurse so quickly.  “They’re usually just so sick,” she had told me.  But not you … because God had his hands on you.  He made you so special.  The first time I nursed (well, attempted anyway … you had other plans for a lazy afternoon nap), I looked down and thought to myself how beautiful you were and how your “O” and I were designed to fit perfectly together like a puzzle, your belly right between my  boobs ... (Am I allowed to say that on here?)  But it’s true.  We were a perfect fit.  You nuzzled right up and fell asleep. 

                Hayden, my precious child, I cannot explain to you the depth of my love or devotion … God made you so perfect and so special … Not just any kind of special, but a one in ten thousand kind of special.  You are so loved by so many, but by none more than your mother (your father might disagree, but that’s okay … I’ll let him think that he’s right … I have to do that every now and then.)  As my mother put it in a letter that she wrote to you, back before we knew exactly what your life would be like, “many people in this sinful world might think that because you will not be “perfect”, you would have little or no value.”  By the grace of God, your Mommy and Daddy knew differently.  We had decided early on (decided really isn’t the right word, because for us, it was never a choice … it was simple, immediate acceptance), that we would love you and accept you regardless of your abilities or disabilities … and while we know you still face many challenges in the days, weeks, months, and years ahead, we are so blessed that you have renewed our faith in a gracious, merciful, loving God. ).  You are a light in a dark and sinful world, a light that shines brightly and gives hope to so many who desperately need a savior.  Keep shining little man.

All my love,

Your mother

 

 

When the stars came crashing down
In tiny pieces to the ground
I was all alone down here
Trapped beneath the atmosphere
Then I, thought somebody called my name
I spun around and caught a flame
I gave into a God I didn't know
And now everything is falling into place
A brand new life is calling and I owe it all to grace

It's so much brighter living in your world
Savior what you did for me
You gave me something I want everyone to see
When we stumble and it all goes wrong
Only you can make it right
So I say oh oh oh oh oh
I'm learning to be the light
whoa, whoa
I'm learning to be the light
whoa, whoa

When a heart is cold as ice
You can't melt it with advice
No one wants to listen to
A list of things they shouldn't do
So I build a city on a hill
And I light a candle on the sill
Knowing you'll be always knocking at the door
Oh God I just want to love on everyone
All I have is yours to give so let the people come

It's so much brighter living in your world
Savior what you did for me
You gave me something I want everyone to see
When we stumble and it all goes wrong
Only you can make it right
So I say oh oh oh oh oh
I'm learning to be the light
whoa, whoa
I'm learning to be the light
whoa, whoa
im learning to be the light

that makes the shadows hide
the light that breaks the curse of pride
the light that takes the weary in it's arms

When it all came crashing down
There was only darkness all around
But in the distance I could see
A Flame

It's So much brighter living in your world
Savior what you did for me
You gave me something I want everyone, and I mean everyone to see
When we stumble and it all goes wrong
Only you can make it right
So I say oh oh oh oh oh
I'm learning to be the light
whoa, whoa
I'm learning to be the light
whoa, whoa
I'm learning to be the light
whoa, whoa
I'm learning to be the light
whoa, whoa
I'm learning to be the light

Poop and More Poop!

Well, I can add another "Downs" to the post from two days ago. I am down with the stomach flu. I headed to the hospital around my normal time yesterday morning...5:30 so I can make it there by rounds. On the way, my stomach didn't quite just feel right. By the time I got cleared to go back into the NICU about 6:00, I was sweating and knew something was up. I didn't want to do it, but I gave the boy  a kiss on his forehead and turned around and headed home. Probably the toughest thing I have done in a long time because I knew what was coming and wasn't happy that I was not going to get to be around Hayden for awhile. Boy, did I ever get sick. I have been awake for only about 3 hours in the past 32 hours. Let me tell you....being stuck at the Ronald McDonald House, in bed, with no tv is not very fun!

However, there are way more "Ups" that could be added that, make me sad I missed them, but filled me with tears of joy as well!  This morning, Hayden had his first "transitional" non-meconium poop which means his digestive system is working! Kelsea said she had just changed a diaper when she heard an explosion! She also just told me that this afternoon was the first time he breastfed with her, instead of falling asleep, and then pooped again! On one hand, it sucks big time that I'm stuck here missing out on these, but at the same time, I feel like God made things better. Today was such big step forward!

Ups and Downs

Ups: Hayden's pooped without a suppository yesterday morning!
Downs: He hasn't pooped in 34 hours.

Ups: After fighting a fever above 38C for close to 72 hours, Hayden is finally back within the normal range at about 36C.
Downs: I have no clue what that means because I don't know how to convert using the metric system!

Ups: Hayden's weight is up to 2590 grams, which is the highest it has been since he was born at 2770g. On the morning of the 20th, he had dropped to 2580 grams, with his lowest weight being 2415g on 1/23.
Downs: I have no clue what that means because I don't know how to convert using the metric system!


Ups: Having the great opportunity and experience to stay at the Ronald McDonald House in West County. What an wonderful place. It is 2.5 years old, was the 300th RMH in the nation, and it is truly an amazing place filled with wonderful volunteers and great dinners.
Downs:  Getting used to "community" living where people don't pick up after themselves and some people think running a bowl under the sink and using their hand to swish water around it for ten seconds is cleaning the bowl!

Ups: Getting up early and being able to start the coffee at the Ronald McDonald House.
Downs: Getting up early to start the coffee, trying to help a guy who speaks zero English make coffee and then realizing he wasn't using the coffee maker to make coffee. He was using the coffee pot to put a packet of hot chocolate in, put cold water in the pot, swishing it around, then set it on the coffee pot warmer to heat it up. I tried to help, but couldn't bridge the communication gap. I let that one go and opted for a Mobil On the Run coffee on my way to the hospital.

Ups: Seeing my boy smile and make cute little noises.
Downs: Leaving him at night, even though I am only about 15 minutes away and I KNOW he is in excellent care.

Ups: Spending some excellent, quality time with my wife.
Downs: None here!

Ups: Being able to show God's love to our "next door neighbors."
Downs: Absolutely none. We have been so blessed with God's love and mercy. Our friends and family have lifted us up in so many ways. It was so amazing to be able to do that for somebody else and let them feel God's love.

Ups: Seeing my parents transform into grandparents. It has been amazing how God has been working on their hearts and turning two already amazing/wonderful people into even more amazing people!
Downs: Kicking them out of the NICU when they are visiting. They love Hayden so much, it always hurts to see those you love "hurting." They are not really hurting, they just don't like not being around him, seeing him, and hearing him.


Our life down here is like a roller coaster. As I said to a gentleman at breakfast at the RMH this morning, this morning was such a great day! Hayden's temperature had finally gotten back down to the 98.6 area and his weight is back up to 5lbs 11oz (it pays to have a conversion app on your iPhone!!!) Tomorrow will probably be a day that is a struggle. However, we continue to thank God for what he has done for us, even when  it involves things that we wouldn't choose or ask for ourselves.

I am truly amazed at the people who are following, praying, and sending love to Kelsea, Hayden, and myself. My jaw hit the floor when I looked at the stats and saw how many people have viewed the different posts on this blog over the past 24 hours. It has truly been a humbling experience. One that we are still learning how to deal with and accept. We don't always get to thank everybody for your kind words or gestures, or respond to your e-mails, or your Facebook posts. However, know that we are seeing them, Hayden is seeing them, and they are lifting us up every minute!

Wait or Weight

So after waiting for 6 days, Kelsea FINALLY got to see his "O" today when surgery came this evening to change the dressing. She was intrigued. Not sure if she liked it or not, but she was glad she was here for rounds first thing this morning (not really...she was kind of bored and wishing she was still asleep) and glad she got to see the surgeons. She is changing his diaper right now and he is getting ready to get weighed! He hasn't pooped in 36 hours, but they won't worry about that until he hits 48 hours. He has kept his food down (hasn't spit up) but probably hasn't gained weight. He did have a VERY good afternoon. Even though he fought a fever, they fought it with Tylenol and his breathing was more controlled. We will call that a successful day! Of course, as I'm typing this and Kelsea is talking to him, his heart rate dropped several times in real quick succession. Even though the doctors told us not to worry because it happens and he recovers on his own in about 3/5th of a second, it still cares the snot out of this new daddy! Well, unfortunately his weight was down again, but I guess that is expected since he is not eating! Still praying for digestion of his milk.

Late Night Phone Calls

As always, if you would like to be updated by an e-mail whenever I add a new post, add your e-mail address in the form below and then click subscribe. You will get an e-mail asking for verification. After you verify your e-mail address, you will get an e-mail the following morning between 9 and 11 a.m. (Central I believe) that shows you I have added a new post.

HOWEVER....TO GET THE FULL EFFECT...INCLUDING PICTURES AND MUSIC, YOU WILL HAVE TO ACTUALLY GO TO THE BLOG WEBSITE. YOU CAN READ THE BLOG ON THE E-MAIL, BUT IT IS BETTER IF YOU OPEN THE LINK AND GO TO THE WEBSITE TO READ!

 

 

Enter your email address:


Delivered by FeedBurner

Yesterday was another long day. I was here at 6:05 and made it just in time for rounds! It is not important for me to be here because I don't really make any decisions, but it is important to me because I want to know what's going on and ask the doctors questions. Plus, it is quiet, peaceful time in the morning when there are a lot of people around.

I am starting to learn all of the nurses' names and have my favorites, and my not so favorites, however I have trouble remembering which nurse was here on which day. That is another reason why I like being here first thing in the morning...so I can keep track of information and data in my personal notebook!

Hayden struggled yesterday with comfort in general. The night nurse from two nights ago was pushing for Tylenol because she felt Hayden was uncomfortable the night before and he was running a fever. He looked uncomfortable, but he wasn't really fussing. Hayden is not like a normal baby. He rarely cries. However, he does kind of make the cutest, most pathetic little whimpers!

Hayden also got to hear one of daddy's favorite songs last night: 10,000 Reasons by Matt Redman. I wrote a previous post about this song which you can access by clicking here.

If you are new here and you would like, you can go back to the beginning by going to the "Blog Archive" to the right. If you click on the triangle next to 2012, then do the same for September, you can click on "Omphalo What?" to read about where this journey started. "Coincidence or God's Divine Plan" and "Omnipresent or Just Hanging Out in the Heart Station" are two pretty powerful entries if you would like to spend a little more time procrastinating and not working today!

As Hayden was watching his video, as I said in the earlier post, he is reasons # 10,001!

Kelsea and I left last night around 8 o'clock and headed back to the Ronald McDonald house. We were ready for a nice dinner and a relaxing night. Had a nice conversation while eating dinner with a guy who had a baby girl at the NICU at Mercy Hospital. She weighed 1 lb 4oz when born at 23 weeks. It is such a humbling experience.

I finally was able to sit down and turn on the tv for the first time in a week! Wouldn't you know, within about 3 minutes, my phone rang and the number was "unknown." Before answering, knew this was from Children's so I jumped up, turned the tv off, and started to head towards the room. It was a Resident from Neonatology and she wanted to let me know that Hayden's respiratory rate had increased and his temperature was high. This was something he battled all day yesterday, and his respiratory rate, at times, would jump up. However, it would quickly lower. His heart rate also rapidly dropped several times throughout the day, but the doctors said this can be any number of things and many babies do this all the time, we just don't know it because they aren't hooked up to a gazillion monitors!

Anyways, I was freaking out because that is not good when the hospital calls you at 10 o'clock at night! However, she wanted to let me know that they started a couple of antibiotics that would treat a wide array of things, did some blood work and cultures, chest x-ray, and gave him some Tylenol. I thanked her for the call and headed up to the room to turn in for the night. I was glad she called me, but at the same time, I was freaked out by the call. I don't want to think about it, but Kelsea and I will now have clothes in waiting every night in case we get a call that we need to quickly get to the hospital in case there is a problem.

We arrived this morning (Kelsea got up early!) right before 6 a.m. and when Kelsea called back (the NICU is a secure/locked area and you have to have the door unlocked for you) and they told her she could go back and "kick out" grandma and grandpa! As she said that, I was writing our names down in the log book and saw mom and dad had signed in at 4:30 this morning. I had a feeling they were going to come in over the night...I was right!

Doctors are doing rounds now. Hayden's temp is still high, but doing better. Ok, Neonatologist just came by and Hayden's temperature was back within normal range. The doctor's reassured Kelsea that things are good and there will be ups and downs, but it was good for her to meet the doctors on the rounds. She still hasn't been able to see Hayden's "O" when surgery comes to change the dressing...she missed it by about 30 seconds yesterday...which by the way, it is looking good. Skin is starting to grow up the sides and it is starting to harden. We are going to go get some coffee/breakfast and let grandma and grandpa spend a little more time before they leave town!